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From lubricants to toys, we have what you need for great oral sex! Preparation For Oral Sex Taking a moment to clean up before oral sex is always a good idea as it can prevent Urinary Tract Infections and make things more carefree once done. The following are some quick tips on how to go about doing this- Clean Your Hands You will want to wash hands well to make sure that you do not introduce harmful bacteria into the vagina or introduce it into the urethra. This applies to both the giver and receiver as often women will play with themselves while receiving oral stimulation and they too should have clean hands. The urethra is sensitive and is easily irritated. It is fairly easy to expose the urethra to bacteria that is harmful and thus often results in a UTI. The activity that can cause a UTI can be sexual or non sexual. Any sexual activity that makes contact with the urethra whether it is from fingers, a sex toy, the mouth, the penis, etc. To help prevent infections and reduce the chances of irritation, a woman should drink lots of water and urinate just before and right after urethral stimulation. Taking precautions such as washing whatever is going to come into contact with the urethra beforehand may assist in preventing such an infection. If an infection occurs it is easily treated with antibiotics. If left untreated the infection can become more serious and spread into the kidneys. Shorten Finger Nails Trim fingernails before going down as using fingers is common and this is done, so as to not cause pain or tears. Atmosphere Creating a relaxing atmosphere can also include doing some sensual foreplay. Get into the mood doing such activities as: Cleaning Your Anus While you may not be thinking about it now, women who are going to receive cunnilingus should clean their anus as well as the vaginal opening. This is because the vagina and anus are extremely close together and sexual activity can easily bring harmful bacteria to enter the urethra causing an infection. Try to clean your anus thoroughly with hot, soapy water before any anal activities. A great alternative are baby wipes, in fact, a strippers technique, many people use them instead of toilet paper for clean up after any bowel movement. Psychological Issues For A Woman There are many women who love the beauty of their vaginas from the way they look to the way the smell, however many women also feel negatively about their "love flowers. Sex will be more pleasurable for her if she is relaxed and feels you are turned on by what you are doing. For those of you receiving a lapping of your labia, let me assure you that all women get self conscious of their vaginal area once in a while. Just like men worry about how big their penis is; women worry about how tight they are. We also worry about whether our partner would prefer us shaved or au natural and finally the biggest concern for most women is the smell factor. Now, there are many who would like to assure you that you should just accept when you aren't your freshest and so should your partner, but honey, I can assure you that washing up before hand if you are experiencing bad odor will make the experience better for all involved. If it is really bad and has been going on for a few weeks even after washing you may have an infection and it is time for a trip to your OBGYN. ALL women's vaginal scent will change during different times of the month However, if your arm pit was having an "off" day you would use some common sense and shower using soap and maybe even use some deodorant. Same applies to your downstairs "girl flower. Psychological Issues For A Man There are in some cultures a stigma that men who perform oral sex on a woman are less macho for doing so. There is nothing about a man going down on a woman that makes him less masculine The other issues for men is that they are concerned about performance which hopefully this article will assist with and again This is no different than a woman going down on a man who had not kept his hygiene up and gets a strong whiff of "ball rot. Either that or have her read an article like this one so she can begin to think about that factor for you! A question I get asked often is about female ejaculation and whether or not it is safe to consume. The answer to that is yes, it is safe as long as you recognize that the risk factors for STDs is the same as your ejaculate so if practicing safe sex is of concern, please take that into consideration and use a dental dam. Negative Attitude- Imagine your woman lying on the bed. You pull her panties down as though you are trying to just get down to business. You open your mouth and begin methodically licking, going up and down with no variation, no passion and secretly, you just can't wait for this to be done. Then when she does orgasm, you demand your turn or get on with the mandatory cuddling you feel you have to do to appease her. Positive Attitude- Imagine your woman lying on the bed. You come in slowly from her ankles smiling at her while keeping eye contact. You teasingly strip the clothes off her entire body looking her over as though you can hardly contain yourself, while licking and rubbing her everywhere you touch. You slide your body against her, then downward now so your genitals are positioned over her knee while you toy with her inner thigh and pubic area. You run your fingers through her pubic hair and over her mound. Slowly you lick the outer lips of her vagina softly while gazing into her eyes showing your desire. Pulling her lips softly apart with your fingers you take some warming, flavored lubricant and run it up and down her opening and over her clit like pouring hot chocolate syrup onto a sundae you are about to devour. Licking her inner lips lightly and then sucking softly on them you move your finger up and down her now slickened pussy and use the other hand to keep her lips spread open as you slide your tongue deeper and deeper into her. You progress to teasing her clit with your tongue while you grind your genitals against her leg and finger her g-spot. Then after a variety of tantalizing techniques you eagerly await her orgasm letting her cum moisten your lips and face. Are you seeing a difference here? Even if you decide to give a "Quickie," your attitude will allow you to be the best she's ever had. Women, just like men, want to feel desired, so to make her feel like orally pleasuring her is repulsive to you is certainly a "blow" to her ego. Show her that you desire her no matter what sexual activity you do and you will really make it fantastic. They are six-inch squares of latex and were first used by oral surgeons. This is the best protection to prevent genital herpes infecting your lips, or a systemic yeast infection. Dental dams are used by those who want to practice safer sex techniques by placing them between your tongue and your lovers labia or anus. For those of you who are too embarrassed to purchase one on-line or in a store, you can always purchase a latex glove and make your own. Oral Sex Techniques First we are going to cover the general aspects of cunnilingus oral sex on a female and then we will muff dive into specifics. To begin, the picture to the right is of the outside of the vagina. Often those performing oral sex ignore the outter lips and forget that licking them, massaging them or both can be a great way to stimulate and ready her for the sexual adventure about to unfold. Using your tongue, fingers, face and sex toys are all ways to begin playing with her beautiful oyster of love. Use Your Words To Seduce These are the moments when you really can feel some tension if there is going to be any General Tips The main physical problems that women experience during oral sex when trying to climax are either that they don't feel that you are continuing to focus on the right area long enough to get them there and need you to do something repetitively, or on the contrary they feel over stimulated and are experiencing numbness and need more variation. If you find that she is really enjoying the grand variety of techniques you are applying you are certainly going in the right direction. However, if you have been changing them over a long time and she is no where close to an orgasm or she seems like she keeps getting close but can't get there; it may be because whatever technique you were doing to get her to orgasm is changing right when she feels she is going to climax and thus it causes the climax to slip away before she can reach it. Watch her breathing and verbal moans for cues as to whether she is about to orgasm. If she begins to build, stay the course and give her a chance to peak before you go to something different. Couples can agree that she help verbally when she is about to orgasm to let the performer know what to keep doing. On the other hand, if you have been doing the same technique for a while and she seems really stimulated by it but just can't seem to climax, it may be from over stimulation. If too much stimulation has been applied to the clitoris then she may find it becoming somewhat numb. How to Choose A Vibrator She will have a very hard time climaxing even though what you are doing feels really good. A great way to help her along is to alternate by focusing on stimulating her via her g-spot if you have been stimulating the clitoris for too long. The tongue, while valiant in it's efforts will not be able to do this effectively, so you will need to get into fingering techniques, which I will cover shortly. Alternating between the clit and g-spot or stimulating them simultaneously is a often a highly effective way to bring pleasure. Let Her Show You Learn What She Prefers Clitorally When a woman uses a clitoral vibrator the tool we recommend to give any woman an orgasm quickly she will often move it around in the beginning to get herself worked up and then hold it in the same place for intensity when she is ready to orgasm. All women are different as to what they enjoy the best from how long they like it to what side of the clitoris they prefer you stimulate so a great way to learn what she likes beyond her telling you, is to have her use a small vibrator in front of you like the Waterdancer and see what her tendencies are when it comes to pleasure. Learn What She Prefers Vaginally When a woman uses a dildo vibrating, rotating, or still she can show you if she likes fast, slow, varied thrusting, and if she wants to feel stretched or simply have a lot of pressure against her g-spot. These things are a great way to learn what she will like from your tongue, finger, penis or sex toy for later play. I suggest this exercise of observation as she may not even be aware of what she is doing to get off Just as one should not simply use only their mouth when giving oral sex to a man Fellatio a partner giving cunnilingus should not feel that once they begin licking they have to stay the course until she orgasms. For those of you who know, doing anything orally can be exhausting. Having a plan to use your hands, another body part or a sex toy is a great way to give your tired mouth and jaw a break until you resume or an opportunity to move into something completely different! The Clitoral Orgasm This orgasm occurs at the peak of clitoral stimulation. It begins with intense sexual excitement within the clit and then as the orgasm peaks it surges waves of pleasure throughout the body. The clitoris is the most sensitive part of a woman's body and sexual arousal is always felt in the clitoris no matter where the orgasm takes place. It is usually that the sexual arousal first originates in the clit, and is considered an orgasmic starting point. The clitoral hood is formed by the connection of the inner vaginal lips. This small hood covers the clitoris in much the same manner as a foreskin covers a penis. When you pull the hood back you can see that the clit is USUALLY about the size of a pencil eraser, however the size does vary from woman to woman, much the same way penis size varies from man to man. The clitoris is abundantly supplied with nerves. The part of the clitoris that you see is actually much like the head of a man's penis, and as a man has a shaft to his penis, a woman has a shaft to her clitoris. The shaft is located above the hood, and is more easily felt when a woman is aroused as it become more rigid as it fills with blood. What Does It Feel Like? Clitoral orgasms can be very intense, but may not be as "deep" as others. These orgasms are no doubt very, very pleasurable and helpful in achieving female ejaculation. Stimulating the clitoris can be a very good place to start when trying to achieve female ejaculation, after providing stimulation to the g-spot. A Reminder- Remember that after an orgasm the clit can retract, and becomes highly sensitive to any further stimulation, often to the point of being painful. Fingering The Clitoris While Licking It A woman's lover will want to respect that the clitoris is the most sensitive part of a woman's body.
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