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Madonna - Your Honesty
Jeff July 26, at 6: We have 2 beautiful teenage daughters. I blame myself entirely for the divorce, due to an addiction I struggled with. We tried to reconcile, recently went on a weekend getaway. I feel so much guilt every day…almost unbearable at times. Trying to let her go…really trying, but dreams every night, etc. Viney May 5, at 1: Met someone a little over 3yrs ago. Within just a few months fell in love with him and thought that he was the one I would spend the rest of my life with. He was very closed with his emotions but I always felt that he loved me just as much. Shortly after moving in together 6months into the relationship we began having problems. We began to fight regularly about everything and eventually I asked him to move out. We were apart a month and then got back together. Six months ago I asked him to leave for the last time. We spoke frequently but could never work through things this time. After 3months of being apart I started to date someone new. He found out and was very very angry. Shortly after he called me wanted to come over and talk. I was scared and still very hurt so I told him no. I basically at that point did the same thing. Told him I still loved him and wanted to try again. He was angry and said no. So for the last couple months we have both continued to see other people, yet we do talk on occassion. We got together about a month or so ago and he told me that their was no chance for us unless I quit seeing this other man. I broke it off with him a week later. But he has continued to see this other woman. I know at this point I need to move on and just let him go. Jay Rogers May 5, at 9: She was all I ever wanted. All the burns meant I was strong enough to fulfill the vows I wholeheartedly meant the day we wed. Any way I weigh it out, this is the right way. This is a whole new ballgame. I keep thinking that the more distance between us, the easier it will get. Do not let a person have so much control over the very thing that keeps you stable, your mind. You are not worthless to women, everyone falls, dust yourself off and meditate and keep it moving. Ask God for strength as well. Cratsky April 6, at 7: Thank you for posting. For that, I am grateful. What IS a healthy relationship? Focus on doing the hard work to better yourself and aim to create the type of future you want. I chose to move on. The more the relationship met needs and fantasies perfectly the harder it is to let go. In a way it is a dual task, there are two things to let go of, the good, and then the bad. That is what makes it so hard, and creates the suffering, the fact of having to think through to contradictory set of feelings, and two different stories about the relationship. Conflicting emotions cause anxiety, but this is even worse, because there is also the need to hold on and believe in both. I find that I miss the bad as much as the good, I had no problem accepting that there was both. He broke up with me, and while it seemed to be good idea, because I was suffering too from the bad things in the relationship, I had no intention of letting go just yet. There is a kind of religiosity about it. Rebekah December 1, at Neither of us wanted to, but we felt we had no choice. We fit together beautifully. Neither of us have ever connected in such beautiful, deep ways with anyone before. I have two kids and he has one, all of which love us together. It seems perfect right? We both know that down the road this issue would pose some major problems for both of us. He agrees with my beliefs and can see himself down the road on the same path I am, but neither of us want him to do anything that doesnt come from deep in his heart. Basically I have to be true to what I believe and he has to decide what he believes. And we both feel to do that we have to go seperate ways. The aweful part is that we both are terribly sad and miss eachother so so much! We love eachother and can see ourselves growing old together! How do I let go when I still feel hope for us? How do I get out of this sad lonely place? Carrie October 8, at I am going thru a breakup right now which is more complicated than complicated could be. And now, I am wondering about the many things I could have done differently had i been brave enough to do it. I miss him so much and i wish i could have my cake and eat it too. The other guy is the one that got away. And i guess i just have to live with that fact starting today. Thank you for this article and to all those who have commented. As sure as Time is a friend, i know I will become whole again. Oh, God help me… Missy May 5, at 8: He was happily married with children and I was happily single and content. When I went to several crisises in my life within a short period of time I chose him to lean on. He was just the person I needed to have in my life during my time of need. We never met in person. I just communicated with him via e-mail. He was a safe outlet and I considered him expendable although I thoroughly enjoyed using him as a confidant, quasi-therapist and friend without benefits except flirting. I started falling for him and told him so. I was in anquish and missed the relationship so I prayed about and wanted to establish a long-term friendship with him. I was never dishonest with him and he was never dishonest with him. I knew we could never be anything more than friends. I got bored one day and got on Facebook and started sending messages to people who were acquaintances and associates of acquaintances and so on. I probably sent messages to about twenty people. One of the people I sent a message too was my friends wife. I complimented him and her and thought it was a nice, cordial message. I was shocked and blown away by his response. I apologized and asked for forgiveness and cried a bucket of tears. I read many, many articles about the subject of getting over a relationship and consulted friends too. I knew that the relationship was over but I did not want to let it go. Even after accepting the fact that the end had come suddenly, abruptly and by surprise I knew that there was nothing that could be done to fix things or make them right. I knew that I had no control over the situation and all I could do was pray. Pray I did and cry I did. I cried so much that it affected my health and body, but in a positive way. My blood pressure actually went down to normal levels. My energy level increased. I was thinking clearly and making plans for my future. For someone who was only an online friend I missed him profusely and had grown more attached to him emotionally than I intended or anticipated. A friend heard about my plight and came over to comfort me.