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7 Surprising Reasons Why You Feel Tired All The Time!
Maybe you snap or want to snap at everyone around you — because your anger feels like a tsunami. Where does this unexplained anger come from? What does it mean? There may be many different causes. One explanation is that you have weak boundaries. You say yes when you really want to say no. But you might not make the connection, said Julie de Azevedo Hanks, Ph. Maybe you expected your spouse to help out more around the house. Years ago, Farris worked with a young woman who realized that focusing on what others did triggered her frustration. Sometimes, you might not feel angry at all. Rather, your actions might be passive-aggressive, and you might feel resentful. For instance, Hanks worked with Cindy not her real name , a woman in her 30s who seemed cheerful and positive—and exhausted. Cindy was an excellent caretaker and had great empathy for everyone but herself. She has two kids with disabilities. Her husband rarely helped. He either disconnected from the kids or exploded at them. Cindy worked very hard to keep everyone happy. Once she connected to her thoughts and feelings, she realized that she felt angry about doing most of the parenting and letting her husband off the hook for not interacting with their kids. She also realized that beneath her anger was loneliness. Become aware of your early warning signs of anger. Which may be different for everyone. Express your emotions without blaming the other person. Plan ahead to handle difficult situations. Take deep breaths to stay in the moment. Notice negative thoughts that trigger your irritation. Take a break when a situation starts to escalate. With her clients Hanks uses the metaphor that emotions are an ocean. Then she asks them to brainstorm the emotions that might be swimming below the surface. Remember that angry feelings are not the same as violent behavior, Hanks said. She also explores self-image issues on her own blog Weightless and creativity on her blog Make a Mess:
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