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During vaginal sex the penis goes into the vagina. It gets you both sexually aroused and ready for penetrative sex. It makes vaginal sex more enjoyable for both partners. Having vaginal sex without using a condom puts you and your partner at risk of unplanned pregnancy, contracting HIV and other sexually transmitted infections STIs. Put a condom on an erect penis before it touches or enters the vagina. Discussing safer sex is an important part of having sex. You might be thinking about having sex for the first time and are not sure where to start. Or maybe you want more information on how to make it pleasurable and safe? Whatever your situation here are answers to some common questions about vaginal sex. What is vaginal sex? During vaginal sex also known as penetrative vaginal sex, vaginal intercourse, sexual intercourse and just sex the penis goes into the vagina. How do you have vaginal sex? There is no one right way of having vaginal sex, but there are a few things that you should think about before you do it. Asking your partner and continuing to communicate as you progress is the best way to make sure you have their consent. It should also help make the experience more pleasurable for you both. Vaginal sex works best when both partners are aroused. This is why foreplay is important. Foreplay sometimes called heavy petting is about getting both people sexually aroused or turned on and ready for penetrative sex, through kissing, stroking, caressing, rubbing and touching. Sometimes people also have oral sex as part of foreplay. The more aroused you both are, the better sex is likely to feel. Foreplay should be enjoyable for both partners and you may choose to not go any further than this stage. Many couples enjoy having foreplay for a long time before they move on to having vaginal sex. If you are both ready to have vaginal sex, the arousal created through foreplay will help the penis enter the vagina more easily. We spent ages on foreplay, kissing, fingering and lots of oral as it was both of our first times. When we did decide to have sex, we used a condom and lots of lube and he was very gentle, kept asking me if he was hurting me and how I felt. It did hurt a bit, but not as much as I was expecting. Once you are both aroused and ready to have sex you can put on a male condom. This can be done by you or your partner. You can only put a condom on an erect penis and you should do this before the penis touches or enters the vagina. If you are using a female condom it can be put in up to eight hours before sex. How do you get the penis into the vagina? When you are ready, it helps if one of you uses your hand to gently guide the penis into the vagina. Once the penis is inside, you can move your bodies so that the penis pushes into the vagina and then pulls partly out again. Do what comes naturally and feels good - being slow and gentle is a good idea to start with so you can make sure you are both comfortable. He was very slow and rather than just pushing into me hard and fast, he took his time making sure I got used to his penis being inside me. He repeatedly asked me if I was ok or wanted him to stop. I told him no and I only felt slightly uncomfortable at first but then when he had fully entered me it felt amazing. He was slow and sensual. If you are not feeling comfortable with what you are doing you have the right to stop! If your partner wants to stop respect their wishes. Will it hurt - and will the woman bleed? It can take a bit of time to get used to the sensation of sex, and some women can find it a little uncomfortable or painful at first. However, the pain should not be intense and if at any time the pain is too strong then you should stop. Taking things slowly, making sure the woman is fully aroused and using a good water-based lubrication oil-based lubricants like massage oils or Vaseline can cause a condom to break can help penetration feel more comfortable. This is generally nothing to worry about. What is the best position for vaginal sex? There is no one best position and different people will enjoy different things. However there are many different possible positions, the woman can be on top, - or you can both lie on your sides. It is easiest to choose a position you both feel comfortable with and one that you can get into easily if you are having sex for the first time. It takes time to get to know what works for you sexually — and for your partner — and sex can be enjoyable whether you climax or not. You may want to experiment with sex toys, or having anal sex and oral sex as well as vaginal sex. Remember that if you do move from anal sex to vaginal sex you should put on a new condom to make sure you do not infect the vagina with bacteria. While there are many different options for contraception, only condoms will protect you and your partner from sexually transmitted infections STIs and HIV. Talking to your partner about protection before you start having sex will help things go more smoothly. Being safe will help you both feel more relaxed and make sex more enjoyable. Deciding whether to have sex is a very personal thing. The main things to consider are whether it feels right, and whether you and your partner are both sure. Photos are used for illustrative purposes. They do not imply any health status or behaviour on the part of the people in the photo.
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