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The Real Reason Giovanna Plowman Ate Her Own Tampon
Here you will find mischievous, sassy, sexy and naughty jokes are not intended for children. Adults jokes are strictly for adults. If you are not in a prison. A little boy caught his mom and dad having sex. A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job! Having sex is like playing bridge. What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection? A Quarter Ponder with Cheese. Twelve monks were about to be ordained. The final test was for them to line up nude, in a garden while a nude model danced before them. Each monk had a small bell attached to his privates, and they were told that anyone whose bell rang would not be ordained because he had not reached a state of purity. The model danced before the first monk candidate, with no reaction. She proceeded down the line with the same response, until she got to the final monk. As she danced, his bell rang so loudly it fell off and clattered to the ground. Embarrassed, he bent down to pick up the bell, and all the other bells went off. Why did the woman cross the road? Who cares — what was she doing out of the kitchen anyway? Why do dwarfs laugh when they play soccer? The grass tickles their balls. When he is standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice. Your job still sucks! More adult jokes A girl realized that she had grown hair between her legs. She got worried and asked her mom about that hair. By becoming a ventriloquist! A woman places an ad in the local newspaper. He keeps getting nailed to the boards. Two cowboys are out on the range talking about their favorite sex position. Dress her up as an alter boy. A blond jogging at the park was rapped. Hundreds of blonds are jogging at the park! How do you kill a circus clown? Go for the juggler! His son asked Dad why? He answered, so that when I am dead, no one will chase your mum. Did you hear about the guy who died of a Viagra overdose?? A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again. Pepper come cum in a bottle? Because his wife died! Who was the worlds first carpenter? Eve, because she made Adams banana stand. What do you call a cheap circumcision? So how I supose to call you? Like everybody — Steven. They steal all the green cards. A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex. What do you get when you do that? How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck? When you pull her pants down her ass is still in them. What do preists and Mcdonalds have in common? They both stick there meat in 10 year old buns. I was sitting on my own in a restaurant, when I saw a beautiful woman at another table. I sent her a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu. Kermit the frogs finger. Why do they call it PMS? Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken. Did you guys hear about the cannibal that made a bunch of businessmen into Chili? I guess he liked seasoned professionals. You can only fit three fingers inside a bowling ball! How do you circumcise a hillbilly? Kick his sister in the jaw. What do you call a white guy surrounded by 9 black guys? The old man lies on the bed but the old woman lies down on the floor. How many is a brazilian? A little girl and boy are fighting about the differences between the sexes, and which one is better. A while later, she comes running back with a smile on her face. They already fell for that trick once. Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering A minor. A little boy with diarrhea tells his mom that he needs Viagra. A little get together. What do you call an afghan virgin? Never bin laid on Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey? Because Kermit likes sweet and sour pork. The bible teaches us to love, and Kamasutra shows how to do that. Why did God give men penises? What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and E. Mickey Mouse is in the middle of a nasty divorce from Minnie Mouse. Mickey spoke to the judge about the separation. What did the elephant say to a naked man? What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A lickalotopis. Where you put the cucumber. What do girls and noodles have in common? They both wiggle when you eat them. What did One gay sperm say to another? How do we find an egg in all of this shit? I asked a Chinese girl for her number. Anyone can roast beef. Why did Tigger look in the toilet? Because he was looking for Pooh. Did you hear about the African American girl who was quiet during the movie? What do you call a 13 year old girl from Kentucky who can run faster than her six brothers? Did you hear about the celebrity murderer? He was shooting for the stars. What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? And possibly use a lubricant. Did you hear about the Mexican racist? He joined the que que que.
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